someone give me a bullet

I kept my mouth shut (and fingers still) through the Christmas season, but I can be silent no more.

There is a song that I heard on the Christian station last year, and it has now become a staple in the rotation on the pop stations as well, that makes my blood boil.

The song is about a little child whose mother is dying on Christmas Eve, and he wants to buy a special pair of shoes so she’ll look pretty when she meets Jesus.

This is so wrong on soooo many levels.

First, this is NOT an uplifting song. It is depressing. We do not need any pressure towards depression at this time of year. It is already the period with the highest suicide rate; let’s just push a few more people over the edge.

Grr.

Next level of wrongness: Why does Mommy need to look pretty for Jesus? There is a Daddy in the song; is the child trying to set Mommy up for a date on the other side? That actually disturbs me even more.

Double Grr.

Third, what kind of parent lets their child run out, unescorted, after a pair of shoes while the other parent is taking their final breaths? I want to slap the father in the song, which definitely is not a response one hopes to have to a Christmas song.

Triple Grr.

Fourth, I wore out the batteries on my remote changing off of stations playing the stinking song. I want the guy who wrote the song to send me a set of AAA batteries. And not cheap ones.

Rant over. Joy to the world.

that’s not a 6: on the clock, is it?

Overslept.

In the 40+ years I’ve been hanging around this planet, I have done that a total of two times, both in the last six months.

I’m not talking about when you wake up and say, “I think I’ll just sleep in this morning.” I don’t do that very often either, but that requires intent. No, this was one of those mornings where you wake up, look at the clock, and say, “Uh-oh.”

Most people would probably say something a little stronger than that; I’m just a little too Beaver-Cleaverish.

If the current trend continues, by the time I’m in my 80’s, I may oversleep for more than half a week.

I’m such a slacker.

now that’s a party

Listening to NPR this morning on the way in, I heard a piece they did on political persons who passed this year. This was framed by the previous story, that of the death of Gerald Ford. The Ford story was tasteful and somewhat poignant…very appropriate.

Yesterday they asked Cokie Roberts, a frequent NPR contributor, for her thoughts and memories, and she shared a conversation she once had with the late president. He talked about how, during his dozen terms representing Michigan, he and his colleagues from across the political aisle would stand on the floor and argue their points of view, but how at the end of the day they would sit down together and share a meal…because the people were more important than the politics.

I return you now to this morning’s story of other politicos who’ve passed. Ann Richards, former Texas governor…they played a snippet of her speech at the 1988 Democratic Convention where she said (referring to Bush 41, not 43), “Poor George Bush…he was born with a silver foot in his mouth.” Next they played a quote from the recently departed Loyd Benson, who in a VP debate with Dan Quayle made the famous statement, “I served with Jack Kennedy. I knew Jack Kennedy. You, sir, are no Jack Kennedy.” Funny lines, both of them. But this underscores part of the reason we are failing as a country.

Political people care no more for statescraft. Staesmanship has been replaced with one-upmanship. If someone has political aspirations, they have to be able to snap out one-liners about their opposition. Nobody cares if they have any personal substance, or if they see the longer view; it is all about being oh-so-sarcastic, not about being oh-so-intelligent.

Sadly, neither party wins in this post.

Watch out, Jon Stewart; there are a few hundred people in Washington who all appear to be gunning for your job.

train wreck

On Christmas eve, my darling boy went to bed as the proud owner of a small oval of track, three circus cars, and one Thomas the Tank Engine wooden train engine.

Then Christmas happened.

By the time the carnage had ended around 2:00 p.m. yesterday, my son was a railroad tycoon. I built him a train table (pretty cool design if I do say so myself), and we got him some track – enough to build a figure-8 layout with two sidings. I’m still in a bit of a daze, so I can’t really match presents with people yet; but the munchkin now owns a half dozen of Thomas’ engine friends, a second Thomas, three circus cars, two passenger cars, a steamroller, and a couple of structures and plants…

Do I sound jealous?

meaningless headlines

On both NPR and the local news radio station, one of the lead stories this morning was that more Americans have now died in Iraq than were killed on 9/11.

Forgive me, but so what?

A more meaningful number, if people want to play the numbers game, is how many terrorists (pardon me, that should read alleged terrorists) are now finding out what God thinks of their ilk due to the efforts of our troops.

Besides, the 9/11 casualty count is an iffy thing. Do you only count the people immediately killed at the two main sites plus Shanksville, or do you count the generational effect of families who lost their breadwinner(s), of kids who will act out in violence years from now because of the loss of that September morning?

Here’s something else you’d need an advanced degree in prophecy in calculate; how many of the young hot-headed radical Islamic members of the “Army of God” have died, and how many lives have been spared because those sad, brain-washed kids are no longer capable of blowing up school kids and hopeful construction workers? That would have some meaning.

corporate theft

Somebody snarfed my lunch today from the breakroom freezer.

 I demand an investigation.

I want security cameras and surveillance.

I demand justice.

can’t we all just get along?

Marriage is tough.

Anybody who says, “We never fight” is either still a newlywed, deluded, or living in an unhealthy world of passive/aggressivism.

 I think the latter applied to me for the first couple years of our marriage.

In the last couple of years, my wife and I have discovered a great many topics on which we disagree. We even fight occasionally. Sometimes not fairly.

But I have discovered that the disagreements are helping us grow together rather than apart.

 The trick is, we have to discuss the stuff. Dancing around issues only causes those issues to fester, like a relational zit. Sometimes you gotta pop it. The zit, not your spouse.

We’ve been dancing around some stuff lately, and last night we finally had an honest conversation. The subject matter isn’t really anyone else’s business. Insert your own issues here, the basics are probably somewhat similar.

It seems to come back, always, to expectations; and almost always unvoiced expectations. I may have written this one before – a friend once said that an expectation is an unrealized disappointment. Not that all expectations are bad – they can be quite useful if clearly defined, realistic, and mutually agreed upon by the involved parties…but that’s not what usually happens.

I used to have mechanisms for numbing out when things got tough – but that never resolved anything. The same issues kept coming back and biting me, and usually with full audio-visual replay of related past incidents. Now we try to deal with stuff as it happens. It sucks in the moment. It can be pretty nasty. I hear things from my spouse that I don’t want to hear her say. But it is real, and it is healing. I highly recommend it.

negotiation

There has been a growing call for “negotiation” in the Middle East as a means to resolve the Iraqi situation.

But what does “negotiation” mean?

 It means I have something you want and I am at least somewhat willing to relinquish it, in exchange for something you have that I want (and with which you are likewise somewhat willing to part).

The US has historically been pretty good at negotiation. Throughout the Cold War, for instance, we were willing to give a lot away in order to extend our influence, and many of the nations wanted our goods, our money, and/or our military hardware. We had what they wanted, and they could offer something we wanted in return. This is where the phrase “win/win situation” comes from – everybody walks away with a big goofy grin on their face, thinking they got the better of the deal.

But when it comes to negotiations with Iran and Syria, I have to ask – what do we have that they want?

They don’t really want us out of the war – they love having us nearby as a scapegoat. It is even more fun to mess with us than it is to chant “Death to Israel.” For one thing, we don’t swat back as hard.

But in terms of negotiation, the mullahs of the Revolutionary Council want nothing from the Great Satan, other than to roll over and die. I for one do not think we should offer that in negotiations.

And what do they have that we want? We want them to stop. Stop funding suicide/homocide bombers. Stop nuclear development. Stop denying the Holocaust. Stop poking your brother, or we’ll have to pull this van over; and you don’t want us to do that, now do you? Oh, sorry, was getting confused by other juvenile behavior in my more immediate world.

Same holds for North Korea. Direct talks? At least there, one can look at the direct history of our negotiations and see how stupid that would be. Kim Jong Il has nothing to give us that he is willing to give up. His family line’s future is dependent on him keeping his military happy, and they want more nuke toys.

I don’t negotiate with my kids when they behave selfishly. Nation-states should take note.

rip van winkle

An unusual experience when returning from lunch…

 I started a gig with a new employer last week. Things are basically good, better than average I would say. I feel like I generally click with my cohorts, but that seems to happen with most of my coworkers anywhere.

But I went to lunch with a few today.

Things were fine through lunch, but when we arrived back at the office, someone noticed the bumper sticker on another coworker’s car. It says simply “I Love My Wife,” though the love is represented by the typical heart-shape. One of the others in our group went over to read the fine print – “Promise Keepers” it read.

 I’m not a member of that organization, but I have read some of their material, and I believe that their primary focus is on helping men be faithful husbands and loving fathers, something I doubt most would find objectionable.

But one of my cohorts said, “Ownership.” Another said, “Scary people.”

It is funny to me how everything that conservative people believe in must somehow be dark at the core, in some people’s eyes. Are there extreme members of that particular group who may represent a 1st-century view of women as chattle? Sure, but that hardly represents the views of friends of mine who are active in the group.

Odd how it is only okay to spout generalities when they apply to conservative groups. If it flows the other way, it is considered “hate.”

a little lower than the angels

When I went to college, they said, “Boy, get this straight -
You’re just a tailless monkey, you’re a hairless ape.”
They said, “Shut up – don’t make no ripples;
Shut up – don’t raise no stink”
I heard so much of their drivel
It’s a wonder I can think.
- Rich Mullins, from Higher Education and the Book of Love

Not everyone in the world uses the Bible as, um, holy writ, so I understand you may not agree with the basis of this post. Yet, there is something universal about the truth within that I hope can transcend that point.

 I wonder sometimes if much of what troubles us in our daily interactions, and even on the world stage, woud be simplified or even avoided if we saw ourselves as being created a little lower than the angels, rather than little better than the animals.

Example: Recently a female pop-star made the party rounds wearing a short dress and, um, “going commando.” Did she just not notice that she forgot her underoos, or was she (just maybe) trying to raise a scandal to revive her notariety (lost recently due to child-bearing)? I somehow doubt she was expecting people to nod and say, “Oh, I forget my underwear all the time. I understand.” I suspect her publicist said, “People have practically forgotten the Madonna kiss thing – time to stir the pot.”

Example: Former Seinfeld star, Michael Richards, goes on a racist rant because some of the comedy club patrons where he was performing were talking loudly while he was performing. They were downright rude, so he upped the ante by becoming downrighter rudier. Here we have a group of people that don’t see the worth in each other.

I’m not suggesting a world-wide group hug, or even that we record a sequel to “We Are the World” (although the thought of a pack of gangsta rappers singing that has strong appeal to my sense of irony).

 I just wonder what would change if we viewed ourselves and those around us as containing a spark of the Creator and as potential allies in a rough-and-tumble world, rather than as competition for our daily bread.