Scrapwood

Entries from May 2007

mystery speaker

May 30, 2007 · Leave a Comment

 Read the following paragraph:

“There is no greater force for economic growth than free markets. But markets work best with rules that promote our values, protect our workers and give all people a chance to succeed. Fairness doesn’t just happen. It requires the right government policies.”

Is the speaker:
A) Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao
B) Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez
C) Presidential Wanna-Be Hillary Clinton

If you guessed A, sorry. It would make sense – some observers say China has more of a free market system than the U.S., but that’s not our mystery speaker.

If you chose B, close, but no cigarillo. Hugo wants free markets, but all owned by the government. Does the term oxymoron mean anything to you?

If you guessed C, congratulations.

Indeed, the heiress apparent to the throne of Bill is opening up; and the more I see, the more I fear. If you don’t see what scares me, consider the terms “free market” and “government policies.” Those go together like oil and water. And she is the front-runner for chief executress.

Scary times.

Categories: on being politically incorrect

proverbs 28:2

May 28, 2007 · Leave a Comment

When a country is rebellious, it has many rulers,
but a man of understanding and knowledge maintains order.

Read into this what you will…

Categories: stuff in my head

thank you, tom lehrer

May 21, 2007 · Leave a Comment

A blast from the past - 1990ish, though I could swear I heard it
on the Dr. Demento show in the early 80's...
Oh, the white folks hate the black folks
And the black folks hate the white folks
To hate all but the right folks
Is an old established rule
But during National Brotherhood Week
National Brotherhood Week
Lena Horne and Sheriff Clark
Are dancing cheek to cheek
It's fun to eulogize
The people you despise
As long as you don't let 'em in your school

Oh, the poor folks hate the rich folks
And the rich folks hate the poor folks
All of my folks hate all of your folks
It's American as apple pie

But during National Brotherhood Week
National Brotherhood Week
New Yorkers love the Puerto Ricans
'Cause it's very chic
Step up and shake the hand
Of someone you can't stand
You can tolerate him if you try

Oh, the Protestants hate the Catholics
And the Catholics hate the Protestants
And the Hindus hate the Moslems
And everybody hates the Jews

But during National Brotherhood Week
National Brotherhood Week
It's National Everyone-Smile-At-One-Another-hood Week
Be nice to people who
Are inferior to you
It's only for a week, so have no fear
Be grateful that it doesn't last all year!

Categories: on being politically incorrect

the problem with capitalism

May 18, 2007 · Leave a Comment

“ism”s are always flawed. “ism”s are of human design, and we are not capable of perfection. There is always something near the core of any human approach that leans on a premise or an assumption that turns out to be faulty.

So it is with capitalism.

If you’ve read me before, you probably think I switched to some new medication this morning, or have been brainwashed by the left-wing media.

Calm down; I’m really okay.

So what’s the problem?

Capitalism assumes that people have at heart a desire to succeed and thrive. If I want to elevate my place in this world, per capitalism, I will work hard and then enjoy the fruits of my labors. My inner drive, and the fruits of my labor being passed to others hands as I elevate my standard of living, will fuel growth for others. What was pooh-poohed in the early eighties as “Reaganomics” was not much more than a re-focusing on pure capitalism.

And the problem is…?

The assumption. As I look at the country around me, I see that a large number of my countryfolk have decided to trade in their desire to succeed for a desire to be comfortable with no effort. Whether it is their intent or not, many of our citizens have paved the way for American Socialism to take the helm.

Just give me a retirement system. Take whatever you want out of my paycheck; just take care of me. I’m tired of working (if I ever worked at all). It isn’t fair that some people have more than me; they must’ve been born rich. I deserve a break because I’m {insert special category here}.

Yep, ’tis a problem. Capitalism breaks down when the majority of society no longer wants to improve their own lot by their own labor.

Is our system bound to fail? If I may quote The Joker from the first of the modern-day Batman movies, “What this town needs is an enema.” Government does a very few things very well – the military is the best example – but most areas where the government steps in devolve into class warfare and dependency. Government does not retreat easily from areas where it exerts authority, and government has no soul. If we cannot turn from our leanings toward socialism, the American experiment will become another chapter in the history books (Mommy, why did Grandpa go to work every day? Wasn’t there a government when he was younger?).

I’m inspired by my father, who left a lower-middle class birthright and elevated us to upper-middle class through hard work and smart decisions. I’m inspired by Chris Gardner, the central figure in The Pursuit of Happyness, who refused to let life keep him down. I’m inspired by my maternal grandmother, who was widowed at the age of 31 and worked her way from secretary to bank officer while raising two kids – and she didn’t take any handouts to do it. These are our role models. Seen any inspirational posters featuring welfare moms and street people lately?

Control is an illusion, and money does not buy happiness; but I take pride in what I do for my family. And as we turn further away from the capitalism that was a large part of our American heritage and success, I feel a growing sense of contempt for those who would sit and wait for someone else to provide them what they should be working for themselves.

Categories: Beware of Falling Dollars · Home Sweet Home · on being politically incorrect · stuff in my head

i’m just a fool…

May 18, 2007 · Leave a Comment

A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions.
- Proverbs 18:2

I have a lot of opinions. I sometimes share them a little too freely. That sometimes gets me in trouble.

I voiced a few opinions at work this week and I’ve been under assault ever since.

So was it talking about religion, politics, or sports that got me in trouble? No, although I’ve covered all three.

My cardinal sin was mentioning that one of the DBAs should consider letting the rest of us know when he changes the URL of the servers the development team uses to do our jobs. I emphasized that many of us in development come in around 7:00 and waiting for the DBA to roll in around 10:00 is problematic. I also suggested that maybe he could send an email with the new URLs when he completes his work (the night before) to avoid a shutdown by the programming team.

Apparently I should stick to religion and politics. They are much safer to discuss in the office.

Grr.

Categories: stuff in my head

making technology work for you

May 12, 2007 · Leave a Comment

Thanks to halo for the link – gotta get one of these set up.

Categories: Bad internet

supporting the troops/supporting the war

May 10, 2007 · Leave a Comment

One of my coworkers on the trip, who seems to like to draw others into debate, said something about Rosie O’Donnell at dinner the other night. I think she sensed that topic wasn’t going to get any traction with the three conservatives sitting around the table, so she said, “Just because someone says we shouldn’t be in Iraq, doesn’t mean they don’t support the troops.”

I agree.

This particular coworker gives many of her weekends to ride with the Honor Gaurd, bikers who attend the funerals of fallen soldiers in order to protect the families from the wackos who try to insult the memory of the deceased with political hate speech.

I count my coworker as one who does indeed honor the troops without supporting the war.

The problem is (as it is in most issues) that the loudest voices against the war do not support the troops. Quothe Jake Murtha: U.S. troops are murdering Iraqis “in cold blood.” Sayeth John Kerry: Our soldiers are raiding civilians houses “in the dark of night, terrorizing the families.” Cold-blooded terrorists? That is not support.

I  know there is a mile between calling the troops terrorists and wishing that they could come home.

I wish they could come home.

Forgive me for what may seem a rabbit trail here – I attended a work shop last weekend by a gent who has more letters after his name than a bowl of alphabet soup. He’s a PhD, ASA, PDQ, BBC, BBQ, etc., specializing in the human brain and relationships. He talked about the Triune brain, and how things are filtered through its parts. The base level controls our fight-or-flight instinct, and as it evaluates our environment 2000-something times per second, it has the ability to switch on or off the other parts of the brain if it perceives a threat. Level 2 is the limbic system, which is primarily where emotions and emotional responses are generated. Finally we get to the neocortex, the part of the brain where logic is king. One statement the speaker made that really stuck with me is that the mature brain is capable of evaluating things (Level 1) in terms of threat potential, formulating an emotional response (Level 2), but then kicking in with logic to determine if that response is appropriate or proportional to the situation at hand.

Consider this; the people you think of as less mature – don’t they tend to have an emotional response to things that most people either ignore or accept? I’m not saying every emotional response is a sign of immaturity – emotion is there for good reason. But there is a point where most people control their emotions, or employ filters to keep things in check.

I would argue that most of the “bring them home now” movement is based completely in emotion, with little regard for logic. “How many more are going to die?” ignores how many more would die if we just folded up our tents and came home. Emotionally, I do not wish death on any of the troops and want them home now. Logically, I see the nation of Iraq becoming the base for Islamic jihaadists and an open training camp for those who would reclaim the “high-watermark” lands of Europe and beyond for fundamentalist Islam, and that our presence there (while horribly costly) is probably the only thing that prevents that. USA Today, that beacon of great stats, said yesterday that sixty-something percent of us think the troops should come home now; meanwhile, almost as high a percentage believe our troops are the only thing keeping Iraq from turning into a giant terrorist training camp for the most radical elements.

Listen to the logical part of your brain, people. It is telling you what happens if we pull out without helping to establish a standing government.

“But we got Saddam; mission accomplished; let’s get out.”

How long did we stay in Japan to help them get back on their feet following WWII? How about Germany? I’m amazed we didn’t set up a base in England after the American Revolution to help the English recover.

Terrorists play on your emotions, betting that you will respond with fear rather than thinking through what happens if you  give them their desires. Don’t reward them.

Think.

Categories: Bad media · stuff in my head · terrorism

and now, in other news…

May 10, 2007 · Leave a Comment

Local newspapers are kinda fun for me. I’m fascinated by the difference in focus in what local editors think will capture the eye of their readers.

Honestly, I think most local papers could just put the comics on page 1 and save most of us a lot of trouble.

But that would be like expecting grocery stores to put milk at the front of the store.

Today’s Fort Worth Star-Telegram features the following front page:

  •  5 ways to pamper your pet
  • Special-session threat spurs lawmakers
  • Gas prices unlikely to travel that far
  • Divided by violence and fear, Iraqis retreat to separate worlds
  • Boswell to retire as city manager early next year

Okay, so above the fold we have four actual news stories and a mention of the lead article in the Living section. Not bad. Now let’s look below the fold (the lower half of page 1):

  • King of the Road (consumer reporter searches for the perfect cup for coffee to go)
  • Having another bad-hair day? Blame it on the rain (in which an investigative reporter talks to hairstylists about how the recent unrelenting rain has affected big hair around the Dallas/Fort Worth Metroplex)
  • And then there were three (an American Idol update)
  • Blair’s decade in office nearing end (which features a series of five pictures showing how Tony has aged)
  • GPS for airliners might take off

Personally, I’m shocked the big hair story was below the fold. No insult intended, ma’am; this bein’ Texas and all, big hair is about as common as an oil rig. And I can see two of those from my hotel window. Oil rigs, that is. Black gold. Texas tea. Etcetera, etcetera.

Categories: stuff in my head

deep in the heart of texas

May 9, 2007 · Leave a Comment

What a short, strange trip it’s been.

I arrived at Atlanta-Hartsfield-Jackson-King-Cougar-Mellencamp airport at noonish Monday and arrived at our destination at around 7:30 Monday p.m.

Could’ve driven it in about the same time, and with more elbow room.

Bought a copy of We Were Soldiers Once…And Young to pass the time, and have been absorbed every spare moment since. The movie wasn’t bad, but this book is a straight-forward, tell-it-like-it-was book written from the viewpoints (and in the words) of several of the American soldiers and a few of the North Vietnamese leaders about the battle of the Ia Drang valley, an episode which pitted America’s finest in a test of a new coordinated method of attack – airborne calvary – against a decidedly low-tech adversary. I’ve wanted to hug a soldier, cry, scream…it is a very affective book.

Yes, I know that is a misspelling. I mean to emphasize that one cannot help but be affected by it.  I highly recommend it.

Meanwhile, in my real life, I discovered today that a project that has consumed me for the last several months was based on some very incorrerct assumptions. There is always a gap between what management says should happen as opposed to what does happen, but it appears that the data that is the basis for a series of management reports is fundamentally flawed, and I shall be returning to the drawing boards tomorrow. Only I’ll be drawing on someone else’s board, since mine is several hundred miles east.

Official statement: I hate traveling for business. Just thought you should know.

Good night, Mary Ellen. Good night, Jim Bob.

Categories: stuff in my head

there are no atheists…in an airplane?

May 7, 2007 · 4 Comments

Flying to DFW today to spend a week communing with oil and natural gas wells. This song always starts playing in my head as I prep for a trip.

Up on the airplane – nearer my God to Thee
I start making a deal – inspired by gravity

If I did wrong, I won’t do it again – I can be sweet and good and nice
And if I had enemies, they’re friends; I hold onto my life with the grip of a vice

Up on the airplane – nearer my God to Thee
I start making a deal inspired by gravity

That little spot on the ground is my hometown – I like to call it my home and it’s sweet
I’d rather take a seat down there than a throne up here up above 30,000 feet
And I’m up on the airplane…

I never should’ve read my horoscope or the fortune on the bubble gum strip
Saying what you think won’t happen will – great thing to read before a trip on an airplane

Pilot says the big blue sky’s like a swimming pool – big fluffy clouds like a feather bed
I’d rather have a real pillow underneath my head,
Lying in my bed,
Which is in my hometown,
Which is on the ground far from an airplane…

Indigo Girls, 1989

Categories: not at all original